one and one

For 5 1/2 months, A&R shared a space.  A warm & comfy place.  Right in mama's belly.  Right where they belonged.  Safe and together.  That's where they first met, and that's where they plotted to poke & prod, and kick and do somersaults.  Oh how I loved those somersaults. 
Their first 'inside' picture together
When the kids were in the NICU, Seamus and I would constantly talk about the day they would both come home and we would be a complete family under on roof.  That day always seemed so far away, and as we sat on the couch or in bed talking about a day that was still just in our imaginations, I would always say that all I want is my 'one and one'.  Both A&R are my number ones.  No one is number two.

For the first 4 months of their life, A&R were separated.  I would always hear about the amazing bond twins have, napping together, louging together, and I was always saddened that my boys were missing out on that.  I wondered if they even knew each other existed.  I read preemie stories about how one twin's presence immediately made the other twin stronger.  It tore at my heart each and every day to have them separated for so long.  But that was protocol at our NICU. 

A few days before Ryan was discharged, I chatted with some of the nurses about how we would love to see our boys together again.  Our wish came true.  The day before Ryan came home, he got a new roommate.  His bro-bro.

Their first outside picture together
The next day they were separated again, when we left the hospital with Ryan.  Aiden actually cried the whole time we were filling out our discharge paperwork.  It was so, so sad.  I'll never forget his nurse that day, who proudly picked him up and soothed him to sleep, so that we could take care of business.

After what seemed like an eternity, Aiden came home two weeks later and we were complete. 
Their first 'at home' photo together

Once we were all home, I still had irrational fears that A&R would grow up and not like each other.  Maybe it was trauma from our NICU experience, or maybe it was the Dr. Phil epidose I saw that showed identical twins who hated eachother (for real!), but this fear was there and it was very real for a very long time.  Silly I know.  But I couldn't help it.  

Twin tummy time

Happy St. Patty's Day

so happy together...
Those feelings stayed with me, for a long, long time.  Until a few weeks ago, when I put A&R on a blanket on the floor for some play time, and I went upstairs to brush my teeth.  All of a sudden I heard Ryan laughing.  The kid was cracking up.  I ran down to see what was so funny, and I found Aiden kicking Ryan in the head.  And Ryan loved every minute of it.  It was at this moment, that I knew my boys would be ok.

As the days go on, A&R are becoming more and more aware of eachother.  They laugh and smile, and give each other inquisitive looks.  And every day, my irrational fear is slowly being erased.  I'm beginning to realize, that while I sat there worrying whether my kids would like eachother, they already had a bond that no one could break.  Because they were brought into this world with a best friend.  And they will do great things together. 

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