lucky number 13

Today, my sweets, you are 13 months old.  Time just seems to just be flying right past us.  Our lives are changing on a daily basis, and sometimes it's hard to keep up.  Between the meals and messes, bath times and play times, diaper changes and lullabies...I have to force myself to slow down and enjoy all these moments because pretty soon you won't want mommy (or daddy) to do anything for you.  

Aiden, you so badly want to crawl.  You've been working on this huge milestone for quite some time and each day you get closer and closer to being mobile.  Lord help us, because when you do start crawling, you will destroy anything that's in your path.  That's just your nature.  And we will nurture it. 

Ryan, you're practicing your sitting skills each and every day.  And pretty soon you'll be sitting up and viewing the world from a different angle without a problem.  You're coming up with new sounds almost daily, and your love of laughter grows by the minute.  Your smile makes my heart melt and you quickly remind me why the world goes round whenever I have a moment of impatience or sadness.  

We've been working on 'finger' foods, though you haven't quite realized that you can feed yourselves.  It's funny:  you will put everything else in your mouths, but if it is actually meant to be eaten it only ends up on the floor....or on your face.

Life with twins is such a wild ride, one that I never thought I would be a part of.  But here we are, on this crazy journey together.  The four of us.  Two babies to snuggle, to bathe, to feed, to tickle, to rock, and to love.  Sometimes I can't help but feel torn.  Who do I give my attention to?  Who will be more patient and wait for their turn?  Who needs me the most at this very moment?   I never want either of you to feel second.  You are both my number one, and I hope that I am adequate at showing you that as you grow and evolve into young men.  You were born with your best friend right by your side and I wish for you to always be reminded of that whenever you feel alone or scared. 

One year ago today, Ryan had his first of many surgeries.  We were so different then.  So young and naive.  So unsure of what our family would look like today.  And as I reflect on the feelings I felt that day, I can't help but smile (and of course, cry) because today we are a family of four.  So full of life and love, and so blessed to have each other.  

Please note that Ryan is playing with Aiden's foot.  <3

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